taking my life in my hands

My parents are here from up north for a few days and they are using my car while they're here. This isn't a problem because we have two cars and I work near our house. Yesterday my mom dropped me off at work and they were going to pick me up at the end of the day. Easy, right?

Since my parents have a limited knowledge of this area, I try and give them directions that keep them on main roads. As a result, I had a little bit of a walk from my office to where they were going to pick me up. As soon as I opened the door to leave my building I noticed a big lizard at my feet. What is strange about the lizards at work is that they are much uglier than the ugly lizards we have at our house. Also, these lizards are little bastards because they don't run away as you approach them, as the lizards at our house do. They hold their ground and most times I end up stepping around them. So yesterday I was battling with a testy lizard in my path when I looked over and a SNAKE was quietly going into the bushes nearby. I knew there were snakes in the bushes at my work, but I had never seen one. The snake wasn't too big and he was gray, but I am convinced that all snakes are 1) poisonous and 2) eager to bite me. It's a daily struggle for me.

After I had the wildlife experience I walked down the sidewalk of a busy street near my office towards the corner where my folks were going to get me. As I was crossing the sidewalk (I had the white guy on the crosswalk sign), someone was preparing to make a turn right in my path. I stopped on the sidewalk so the guy would notice me. He didn't notice me and as I was crossing the road he began to make his turn...right into me. I had to do a little dance/jump/scream maneuver to get out of his way to avoid being roadkill. Luckily, I was able to escape, but when I looked back, he didn't even acknowledge the fact that he almost ran me down. Fucker. I hope he gets a flat tire. And a ticket for speeding on 95. But I know neither of those will probably happen.